On Tenderness and Cherry Pistachio Biscotti

2020. You get it. You live on the same planet I do.

Here’s what I have learned:

That I love my people. The ones that live with me, the ones that don’t. The ones that are family by blood, and those that are family by choice.

That there are a whole lot of ugly things in the world I either didn’t think I have a voice about, or I figured I couldn’t make a difference about, that in fact, I can…and now do.

To let stuff go. Of expectations. Of anger. Of dysfunction. Of ghosts from the past. Of rules and mindsets that are bat$h!t crazy. Of people who take way more than they give. Of Facebook friends who post crap I don’t need to read.

If it doesn’t feed my soul, teach me to be better, or resonate with my heart. I am done. I have snoozed, unfollowed, deleted.

I have never been more sensitive to or reactionary to the unkindness out there. Some people really take a bad situation and make it worse. If ever there was a time to stop the judgement and harshness, it’s now. If ever there was a time we needed more kindness and open minded-ness, get out of our own way ness, humble yourself-ness, for sure it is now.

And we are in the midst of Advent. A time where waiting and hope abounds. I was raised Episcopalian, and found my way back there after a rollercoaster ride of another lifetime. And while I currently do church via podcasts (Lutheran), the anticipation of Advent is real in my heart this year more so than in the past.

Because, if we have not hope…what’s the point.

I have not baked much, I have not written much. I have loved much. I have worried much. I have cared much. I have worked outside and worked inside and even gotten a puppy. I have gotten quiet, I have listened to my heart. So, while some stuff has been total crappola this year (like most of it), I am thankful for the gift of being in a safe home with my kids and all that we are privileged to have access to, even in a scary time.

And so…here I am writing after no words would come. Maybe to put kindness out there. Or say the things I want my children to hear.

Things like, “I love you” and “I am proud of you.” Or even, “It’s ok if we don’t have the answer to that right this minute.” Or, “It’s OK for you to be kind to yourself.”

It seems so many things lately are completed with a lot more grace. For others. For myself. Because, life is short, and tender. We should handle it as such.

My son asked me if it was Biscotti Season, meaning, “are you going to make only biscotti now that you are finally baking again?” and I responded, “I don’t know.” Because, in a day to day life filled with Teams Meetings and online Reading Intervention, remote data collection, and the remainder of life stuff that still needs to be done in the midst of a pandemic, I kind of wing the margin stuff. And find, that this method is ok. So maybe I will bake more biscotti. Maybe not.

This biscotti is a combination of my research and my own recipe. I added orange zest where I didn’t find it. I of course added more pistachios and more cherries (because it’s me). I added Vanilla and Almond extract because I happen to love Almond extract and they are my cookies.

I think they almost look christmasy with the green and red. Which is timely.

In this season of anticipation, I send you all light and hope.

I hope you enjoy this recipe, and as always, thank you for coming to the table.

Love,

Chrissy

Print